Sisterhood

Today I want to talk about women in treatment and recovery. I don’t want to pretend that the journey that men and women take in treatment and recovery are the same. They aren’t. Everyone actually has very unique and individualized recovery journeys. Women and men are quite different. They differ in the way that they abuse substances, and in the substances that they abuse. Their bodies metabolize substances very differently than men’s, especially alcohol. They do all of it for different reasons and are often coming from trauma, abuse, domestic partner violence and depression backgrounds. Men do have some of these same issues but not on the same level. Women are often used for trafficking and prostitution and suffer violence while on the streets during their abuse of drugs and alcohol. They carry a great deal of the burden for children whether it’s the guilt of birthing and losing them in addiction or keeping them and being unable to manage them in addiction. Women also turn on other women a lot. In treatment I see women fighting with other women constantly. It’s worse than the men in treatment. Women are scarier than men in treatment. But I have come to the conclusion that we have been mentally prepared over the years to be just that way. If your husband cheats, it’s not his fault, or responsibility, nope, blame the other woman. If your boyfriend at the bar is looking at someone else- well you’d better go punch her in the face...NO, WHAT, Wait a minute, what’s wrong with this picture?!? Why is everything “HER” fault? You could be that “HER” one day, right?!? Since when is a partner not responsible for THEIR own actions? Well, never ladies. Insecure people love to blame others. If you don’t feel valued, loved or confident in a relationship you probably don’t belong in that relationship. It’s toxic. We should feel valued, loved and there should be an equal exchange of affection. We often choose dysfunctional relationships because that’s what’s comfortable. The reason they don’t want you to date in recovery right away is because you are not ready to make healthy choices yet. That takes time. You need to give your brain and emotions time to reset and heal. You might need medication to supplement your Mood. You will be changing and growing constantly and will be making better healthier choices that are better for your life. Hopefully that will include forming a sisterhood that you can be around and bond with You. There is nothing better than women coming together in common to make good things happen. That’s where the magic really occurs. People can really lift each other- that’s why it’s so important to build communities like this. Never give up on each other. People who are the toughest to reach most often have the most to give. Who could you reach out and connect with today and bring into your sisterhood?

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